Hello everyone, I hope we all had a great holiday, today I will like to talk about Paternity fraud. Before I delve into my thoughts about this trending topic, let’s define what Paternity fraud is.
Paternity fraud is the pretence that a man is the legitimate and biological father of a child. It usually occurs when a woman deliberately misidentifies a man as the biological and legitimate father of her child. This fraudulent act led the man to believe a biological connection with a child of another man and sometimes remain undetected for several years. In most cases, women are often aware that the presumed biological father is not genetically linked with the child.
Now what led me to write about it, recently my sister & I were talking about this issue and how it’s becoming prevalent, and just then a thought registered in my heart, but you can do something about it. And then the next question, what can I do? I can definitely keep talking about sexual immorality because the truth is, the most important reason why we are battling with Paternity fraud is that a lot of people in committed relationships who are supposed to be Faithful are cheating on their partners, or even have multiple people they are sleeping with.
Prior to writing this article, I read a lot on Paternity Fraud, what causes it etc. It would interest you to know that according to my findings, Paternity Fraud is caused by
- Infidelity, adultery and increase in sexual recklessness among couples.
- Unprotected sex and multiple partners’ relationships. Another issue is poor family planning among women.
- The pressure for pregnancy before marriage is also a factor. Here, there are two categories. Those who insist on pregnancy as a precondition for marriage and those who decide to get married to anyone who becomes pregnant for them.
- Also, the high emphasis on biological children is a factor. Women are usually considered as being responsible when there are no children. The onus is on her to prove that she is fertile and has not messed up her body before marriage. So to cover shame, she sleeps with someone else to get her pregnant.
- Rape is also an issue.
In all of the above-listed causes, what is the common factor? Sexual Immorality. To be honest, I never knew that Sex in my generation has been made trivial and common. You meet someone today and the next day, you are already sleeping with them. Sex can now be exchanged for grades, phones and even transport fare. Dates now come with the expectation of sex. I don’t know how we got to this point? Is it that there is no more emphasis on morals? Or there is just no big deal to sex?
A cousin of mine who recently got married told me that after experiencing sex (he & his wife married as virgins), it is too intimate an act, too vulnerable an action to just sleep with anybody. He further told me that, stories of guys who like to champion their sexual escapades may, after all, be lying.
I have come to realise that, the Laws of God are for our own benefit. If we all stick to the ways of God, we wouldn’t deal or have most of the issues we face today.
An interesting fact that I believe a lot of you must have already read or seen was the Durex survey that suggested Nigerian women are the most unfaithful in the world and a DNA expert from Lagos University Teaching Hospital claimed that 30% of Nigerian men are not the biological father of all the children in their custody.
The practice of multiple sex partners by young women is now commonplace. Some women keep two or three relationships juggling them until one of them is ready for marriage. The one who is first to be ready will bear the paternity of the pregnancy. Promiscuous and unfaithful women are more likely to misattribute paternity, honestly or dishonestly.
Now the blame is not on the woman alone, after all, it’s a man that gets her pregnant. There’s a story of a lady who while engaged to be married to another man slept with her Ex for “goodbye sex”. For the Love of God, what the hell is goodbye sex? Anyway, she got pregnant for her Ex and decided to still marry her fiancé. Because they’ve already been sleeping together (Lady & Fiancé) he thought the pregnancy was for him. Alas, it turned out to be for the Ex.
Now if the lady had been Faithful to her Fiancé, and the Ex kept his penis to himself, the present case of a broken marriage, a broken heart and even the devastating effect to the child will not arise.
The implications of paternity fraud are major; disrupting relationships, homes, and marriages. Victims of this crime – father or child stand the risk of depression and mental health problems. A child victim is more likely to have self-esteem issues and anxiety. When women make the choice to lie about the paternity of their children, they should bear in mind the misery and heartache these children may later experience.
- The result of research on the sexual promiscuity among Nigerian female undergraduates indicated a 79% agreement on the prevalence of sexual promiscuity amongst female undergraduates.
- Nigeria records the highest rate of male infertility as sperm counts of African men plummet. Possible major causes are poorly treated sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and hormonal abnormalities, consumption of excessive alcohol and tobacco smoking.
- Reports have been making the rounds that Nigeria has the 2nd highest rate of paternity fraud in the world after Jamaica.
Now saying that DNA test should be done for all pregnant women will not solve the issue of paternity fraud, because to be honest, you are saying to your spouse “I don’t trust you”. But it’s not just that, that’s just solving a big problem on the surface.
To properly address the issue of Paternity fraud, we have to Drink water from your own cistern, and running water from your own well. Should your fountains be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets? Let them be only your own, and not for strangers with you. Proverbs 5: 15-18
Now I realised that a lot of media houses seriously doubt the validity of the research that says 30% of Nigerian men are Fathering children who aren’t theirs, but I find this interesting, why?
Are we afraid to face the truth? With the way my generation love sexual immorality, it’s high time we know that our actions have consequences. And Paternity fraud happens to one of them.