How can you celebrate like this? How can you celebrate your birthday like this?! She said mockingly looking me over.
This was what a “mentor” told me after I had told her many months ago that I was going to celebrate my 30th birthday.
I was literally shocked; this was someone I looked up to, telling me I shouldn’t celebrate my thirtieth because I’m still single.
Obviously, her definition of success & celebration is being married.
But I shouldn’t have been too surprised after all, in this part of the world, no matter your level of success or what you’ve achieved, if you’re still unmarried it counts for nothing.
I had always known I would celebrate my 30th birthday, I always knew that. In fact, I had already planned the birthday in my mind and I was determined to save for it.
I had conceived the idea for the party long before I knew I would publish my book this year. I initially didn’t want to combine both celebrations but my sister advised I combine both. And then thinking about it, I realised my best birthday gift is the gift of my book.
When I started distributing the invitation cards for my launch and birthday, not a few people asked me why I included my age on the card.
This concern was first shared by my mum, she didn’t see any reason why I should let the whole world know I was 3o and not just that 30 but a SINGLE one at that. Like why should you throw a party celebrating 30 when you are not married?
And like the devil got the memo, all over social media most of the people I see celebrating 3o are all married and have kids. And it was almost getting to me, but then I have learnt to appreciate my own journey and the fact that our timings are not the same.
A lot of people who have gotten the cards are literally surprised why I am so happy about celebrating 30years of age as an unmarried person. They don’t just get it. And the bold ones have asked me why I’m unperturbed.
In fact, someone told me “women do not tell people their age, and when you’re unmarried you are supposed to hide your age so people don’t make fun of you”.
The above statement was said to me just last week. This person had been telling me “Joke go and marry”, but question will I marry myself? Should I kill myself simply because I’m not married? Shouldn’t I celebrate God’s faithfulness over my life? Is writing and publishing a book not more important than getting married?
A cousin of mine told me she was inspired by my spirit, that she loves the way I’m going about the whole thing, loooooool; like I’m supposed to be depressed?
Well, news flash, this baby girl, this daughter of Zion, this beautiful, mind-blowing fun loving intelligent Amazon with a heart of Gold will celebrate and is celebrating her thirty freaking years on God’s gracious earth.
And today makes it exactly one month to my thirtieth and two days to my book launch.
Yes, I never envisaged I will still be single at this age, yes I do want to get married someday, yes, I’m a hopeless and die-hard romantic, yes I do fantasize on having a family, but YES this girl, until then will celebrate and love her life.
How many people get to write books and publish them, how many people have the opportunity I have to touch and inspire lives, how many people have been blessed with the talents I have and are using them, how many people get to live so old and yet look so young? So yes I will celebrate.
I will not be depressed or whine; I will go against the norm and disappoint the thoughts of the average person.
Yes, I am thirty soon but I love my life and I wouldn’t change it for the world. All of my experiences, downturns and challenges have made me the woman I am today.
Are you single and waiting?
Wait patiently, disappoint the wish of society and live happily, fulfil your dreams, live your purpose, enjoy life & God. Don’t let life pass you by. For in the moment and time you least expect, love will find you and you will wish you had really lived.
So YES I am celebrating like this.
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Thank you for reading, God bless you.