I have heard funny things in the little time I have spent on planet earth, things like, I am possessed that’s why I refused to marry a particular guy and that I needed deliverance, there’s an evil spirit residing in my room that’s why I refused to marry that same particular guy. I thought I had heard everything until this morning when one of my senior colleagues told me, I wouldn’t get a man if I am too slim. He said I should reduce my exercise else no man would be attracted to me.

When the man said so, honestly I laughed because I found it ridiculous. But later as I was ruminating over it, I began to get pissed off, so because I’m single then every; and any activity I do must be tailored to attract or keep a man. He said we are in Africa, and African men are attracted to women who have some flesh on their skin. This is the kind of talk that has kept women, especially in our society in continual bondage. It’s freaking annoying.

Exercise is what I love, and I won’t stop whether or not I’m single or married. Ever since I resumed going to the gym, I have gotten a lot of negative and discouraging comments. My parents especially are so against the idea and I have been wondering why. My colleague’s comments this morning was a sudden light bulb.

My parents are so desperate to see/get me married and they may feel my exercising will make me less attractive to a man (as I would reduce). I have been wondering why they’ve been against it but today it suddenly hit me. I have said it HERE that the fact that one is slim doesn’t mean they’re alright health wise. I do not have to be fat to hit the gym.

My colleague’s theory doesn’t even hold water, there are countless slim women who are happily married and there are chubby ladies who are still single. Why do people stigmatise single ladies and make them feel they are incomplete or in need until there’s a man over them. It’s honestly very pathetic. People always have an opinion over you, offering you solutions to a nonexistent problem.

I love love, I’m a hopeless romantic so there’s no way I won’t get married. I will get married; because I want to; not because society says so. I believe, in lasting love and relationships, confidence is a deciding factor. You must love yourself enough to be able to love someone else. You must be confident and comfortable in your own skin.

Just tell me if I consciously watch my weight to become curvy just to attract a man, then I meet him and one day he says, “Baby you’re getting too fat I want you to reduce” then I will reduce again and become slim; because a man said so. That means I do not even have a direction for my life, my life is decided by every whim of a man; how pathetic. I don’t even think a correct guy would want to have anything to do with a woman who has no mind of her own.

It high time women begin to define their own course of life, society has for too long dictated how we should live our lives.

Dear future husband(in case you’re reading this) I’m not changing my body if you are attracted to it; fine, if you are not please keep it moving. There’s someone who will find it to die for.

Thank you all for reading. If you have similar experiences or you have thoughts about this topic, kindly share them with us in the comments section. If you loved this article, kindly do me a favour by subscribing to this blog or sharing it on social media.

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  1. Lol..I found this post so funny. It made my night. I think its true it is not particularly your weight its just the fact that you are single. They are people that have much more weight and are told that's the reason they can't find a husband.

    I think everyone should just do what works for them and not bow to unnecessary pressure even though it might be so difficult.God will provide a partner at his own perfect time


  2. Well, I guess one thing we cant do in this life is stopping people from having their own opinions over our personal issues, but one thing I'm very sure we can do is to live our life to fullest not minding what people think but what God thinks. Every person need to move from that level of human opinion to God's own opinion. Life is beautiful


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