There are signs and symptoms that shows a relationship may not lead to marriage.
When a person is ill, mostly, there would be signs and symptoms that would show. If a person is sensitive, he would notice some changes which may not show outwardly.
 A man’s body doesn’t just break down in that sense. There would be symptoms, and there would be signs.

Even so, relationship break-up doesn’t just happen from the blues, there would be signs. Sadly enough, we ignore some of these signs, often to our detriment.
Some things are not just going to work!
Have being in this counseling ministry for two decades, I can tell you from God’s word and from the various counseling encounters that some things are not going to work.

By the Spirit of God, I have been enabled to do quite some things in the lives of people across the world.
I have had to listen to regret-laden voices, usually of ladies, who are caught up in a marriage that is more of a bondage.
I have heard to bear with precious ladies, weeping profusely over the phone, sometimes for hours, before they are consoled.
I have heard to bear some of the reports of atrocities perpetrated in a marriage that us supposed to be a covenant, but has been grossly desecrated.

I have had to listen to men, who were frustrated, and are regretting their choice.
 I have had to pacify heart broken ladies who are just discovering some adulterous flings and are entirely devastated.
 I have to settle quarrels between adamant husbands and bitter wives at the verge of divorce. As we talk back and forth over a video call, I could see the pain and agony in the eyes of the wives mostly, and I could see the unrepentant attitude of a man that has tasted the waters of adultery and confusion of the soul has set in. A few times, it is the other way round.
 Pro 9:17-18 (KJV)  
Stolen waters are sweet, and bread eaten in secret is pleasant.  [18]  But he knoweth not that the dead are there; and that her guests are in the depths of hell.
 I could go on and on, but I can tell you by the authority of God upon me some things that just may not work.
 I will attempt to identify a few.
 1. When there is no conviction, confusion is waiting
A conviction of who to marry is very important. Maybe one of the most important thing to settle before plunging into the waters of marriage.

As a child of God, the primary leading has to come from God.
Why is this very important?
You see, marriage comes with its challenges. When there is conviction, you will be rightly positioned to fight theses challenges knowing that you are in God’s perfect will for your life in your marriage.
 If there is no conviction in the first place before marriage, and challenges arise, what comes next is confusion because you are unsure of your choice in the first place.
 At a little provocation, you want to opt out because there is no conviction in the first place.
 So I tell singles, do not jump like an antelope into a relationship! Calm down, pray first, to see what God is saying and not what his or her bank account is telling you!
 Trust me, God knows the best person for you. God is a perfect match-maker. He knows the person that will not drive you into despair. He knows the person that will become your help and not your hell. He knows the person who will be your head and not your headache. He knows the person that will still make a few butterflies come alive in your tummy, even after twenty years of marriage!

 Marriage is a destiny changer! You marry the right person for you and your life is orchestrated by a unforced rhythm of grace and favour. You get into this when you walk and listen to God.
 Mat 11:29 (MSG)  
Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.
 You marry the wrong person and afflictions and heartaches become a constant breakfast and dinner. That will not be your portion in Jesus name.
 Believe you me, you should not marry because of money, for the god of mammon comes with its consequences upon its adherents.
 You don’t marry because of beauty or appearance alone for beauty is vain and there are beautiful faces upon empty heads! 

 Pro 11:22 (MSG)  
Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful face on an empty head.
 A man can be handsome and be extremely wicked.
 So, in effect, a relationship begins with either conviction or confusion.
Usually, conviction and confusion can be submerged in the strong waters of love and infatuation. But when the waters flow away, and the sun comes shining and dries off the water, and then the sun sets and the waters abate and flows no longer, then the eyes open to its foolishness, but usually decisions have been taken and it is often times too late to retreat.
 Young folks, be wise. Beyond the vibrations and chemistry you feel in your body, there must be vibrations of His voice within you and there must be something greater than chemistry, it is called “Shalom.”
 It is the peace of God that passes all understanding and goes beyond chemistry!

 Am I really helping someone now by the Spirit of God?

 Teenagers, calm down. Get to know God first. Develop your relationship first before you start opening your legs for a guy.
 There are guys you open your legs to and you close up your destiny. Grow up first in God. Learn to hear God first so that you hear God for your relationships.
 How do you know this peace? How do you get this conviction? You pray in the Spirit. That is how to find out. It is not by finding out about his or her family history, it is about knowing the heart of God.
 The first thing is not to be questioning him or her, it is to get all questions in your heart answered by God first.
 For those who are already married and you think you married without conviction, chances are that you may not be enjoying yourself now. Do you back out of marriage? No! A big No!
 What then do you do?
 You see, you will now have to take your case before God and ask for mercy. Mercy can suspend the rules. Mercy can turn things around. Mercy can locate your destiny and fix things up. Mercy can travel back to your past in time and correct errors in your lineage. Mercy can find your spouse who is ungodly and will save his or her soul.
 Will you pay the price in the place of intercession? That is your option!

My God can turn a mistake into a miracle. Yes, He can!
 I would have to stop here today! But I promise to continue with this all important topic tomorrow.
 Can I pray for those going through issues now that I just mentioned?
 I pray for God’s direction over you now. You will hear God. You will not miss it. My God will guide you and lead you in the marital path that is specific for you.
 I pray for those who are already married, My God, have mercy! Let your mercy speak now in the name of Jesus.
 I curse every spirit behind confusion, behind incessant quarrels and behind frustration. I declare you free in the name of Jesus.
I will not be confused

Lord, lead me in the way to go in the name of Jesus!

Pro 12:4 (MSG)  A hearty wife invigorates her husband, but a frigid woman is cancer in the bones.

Deuteronomy 21 – 23

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